Having a 17 year old step son with emotional and anger issues

My husband and I got custody of his son when he was approximately 14 years old. Rather mom actually let him come and stay with us and we had no idea why nor did we have any idea what we were in for.We had very much tried to be in his life from the time he had left with his mother which was at the age of 4. She did everything possible to keep us from him she fought us endlessly in court. We spent our entire savings trying to gain custody. We had no idea what his home life was like being we had to have supervised visitation although it was never proved in court to have ever abused the child in any manner.
So obviously frazzled when we were ordered supervised visitation and it to be supervised only at her house by her grandmother or his sister. Prior to his father and I becoming a couple his mother and father ended their relationship when their son was approximately three and a half maybe a little younger during that time his father and her went to court and they were given each four days per week to see the child 4 days with Mom for days with dad. When his father and I got together mom filed for immediate emergency custody based on accusations she came out with and she was granted immediate permanent custody. I guess it was sole custody and dad was given visitation to this day we do not know why this went this way but we fought and mostly and went through a lot of money only to lose and have supervised visits. Although mom was involved with children Services several times and not once was his father notified if he was maybe then we would have had a chance to gain custody or more rights to his son and in doing so eliminated some of the problems the child is having now. So at the age of just prior to 15 I talked mom into letting him stay with us he was getting in a lot of trouble while residing with his mother therefore it was much easier for her to say yes to us because she had always had to stop what she was doing to go get him out of trouble or make sure you was going to school and many other things. Also living in Scranton inner city high narcotics area knowing that he well not really knowing that he knew the drug scene or was using we found out very quickly that he was using marijuana for his anger. He had said that his mother knew him and his cousin had used often and we had a psychiatrist at the we were trying to have him put into a facility to help him work through his issues and problems underlying why he had such rage and he felt the need to use pot as a coping mechanism. During this time his mother had filed with a judge for him to be placed in kids peace and kids peace was to find him a facility for troubled children with problems to help get him the help he actually needed at the same time we were trying to do so we had no idea she was going through the court system doing this he was already and kids peace when the court order was signed by the judge. Right now he is currently in a facility since the eleventh month of last year and he seems to be no further ahead with his anger and dealing with it coping with it in any way shape or form then he was when he was home he actually seems to have been doing better when he was home then he is where he’s at now. We have tried with no avail to speak with the facility he’s currently at we have spoke to endless facility staff and still have not gotten any further than we were when we started to try getting answers answers to things such as why are you not calling us when he leaves the unit and is gone for over 5 hours who is looking for him during this time why is it taking two days for them to call us why has it still been no response from the IEP which is school to a meeting we were supposed to have and his grade and grades that he has to bring up. We have spoke to supervisors staff you name it we spoke to them. We have been looking into other facilities that are their main target and focus would be the child and his well being and the parents and child getting more attention and time spent with parent child. We have told them that we would like to move him and we had and no answers or no suggestions of what we should do or what is the problem or how can we address this. We do know that our son isn’t perfect no child is we also do know that the facility he is at is not living up to their expectations they had givenĀ  a parent hand guide has to the running of their facility and we are to expect from the faculty the facility the staff and have so far not seen any of what they say they do in action… we are currently looking for a different facility to help him deal with his underlying issues that caused him such anger he seems to not have gone any better sense being there. we have talked to all of the staff and have not gotten anywhere as to where or what to do to turn this around we seem to get ya will return your call and they never returned our call. we are looking forward to having our son come home but first and foremost you must learn to deal with his anger and to understand where it’s coming from answer Address where its coming fro the question is now where do we turn to for help if there’s anybody that can give any advice tips it would greatly be appreciate it. I will post more as I have the accurate information before me therefore I’m not speaking out of turn about anybody.

Tammy